We're all the same

We're allllll the sameeeeee and colors don't exist..


We'll firstly i would like to take this opportunity to thank a certain internet service provider in malaysia for keeping me without my dsl for this long forcing me to go back to the stone-age ways and use ... dial-up.. thank you 'this certain isp' you have no idea how much i appriciate it.. really i do..

Okay well a msg for our frequent readers - as you read above, because of my umm short-comings i have not been posting anything fer a long time now hence giving mr.iwahara so much time to practically insult me, my family, my race, my underpants, my body parts and my sexual fetishes too which supposedly is fucking a bottle filled with worms... wow..

Oookay moving on to less important topics
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Following the recent rise in the number of illegal immigrants (especially from NEW DELHI) entering our prestigious nation, once again Face to Ass has turned up to help solve this problem, but not forgetting their hidden but well covered up attempt to make a shit load of money in the process. After much wanking and umm meetings and brainstorming Face to Ass decided that the only way to curb this problem is to build a fucking huge wall around our country or better still just pack em up and send em home.

To achieve this Face to Ass decided to send a representative to interview an indian man to find out why the flying fuck do they come to our country of all fucking places to go to i mean theres thailand (cheap whores) or vietnam (even cheaper whores). So an indian was picked to represent the SEVEN of them who came from NEW DELHI. The interview :-


F2A : Hello. Good morning eh mr. umm, say what is your name?
Unknown indian : I is name chapik.
F2A : ahh yes mr.chapik (damn what a fucked up name) ahem no i mean its cool. so how are you mr.chapik?
Chapik : you are fine
F2A : Yes i'm fine what about you?, how are YOU?
Chapik : yes that is i say you are fine
F2A : you are fine?
Chapik : YES I FINE!
F2A : no no chill dude yeah you cool. So mr.Chapik when you came to our country, did you come alone or with your family?
Chapik : I with family is coming
F2A : How did you and your family come to our country?
Chapik : we all sit in a big box and come. Half the way the box got hole my sister fell out. Bless her soul may she be eaten by a shark.
F2A : ahh cool so you came with you family. Say how many peeps are there in your family
Chapik : 500 millions
F2A : SAY WHAT?!
Chapik : yes 500 millions
F2A : Whoa 500 million in a single family? daymn.. that means yr parents like bang like... daymn..
Chapik : no no my parents never bang me
F2A : good
Chapik : is you gots some tea i may have some?
F2A : yes sir no worries (Hey Kimberly may we have some tea in here for the indian). okay mr.Chapik your tea will be here in a minute. So please tell me how many brothers and sisters do you have?
Chapik : i have one brother and 3 sisters.
F2A : buuuut you just said you have 500 million family members? sorry the numbers just dont add up.
Chapik : nonono you is not understand me. I have 7 people in family my, but i say 500 million because that all my country man and woman. you seeing in my country everyone black, all so black, mother fucking black so it is pretty hard you is know to see different people they all look same.
F2A : damn thats bad... and kinda sad
Chapik : yes i very sad. That time got black-out, you knowing black-out? no light. fuck that time i is bang my chicken, i thinks its my sister. no light i never see all black.
F2A : You banged your chicken? wtf?
Chapik : what the fuck? the fuck is a term using to say .. sex you know bang!
F2A : Yes i know what fuck is! There heres yr tea (throws it at his face)
Chapik : why that was hot and sizzlinging.
F2A : okay lets get back to the interview.
Chapik : yes
F2A : How old are you?
Chapik : umm 8 + 1
F2A : 9?
Chapik : no no 18.
F2A : oh okay 18 years old.
Chapik : no i is not old i young.
F2A : okay mr.Chapik what is yr father?
Chapik : he is a man
F2A : nonono i mean what does he do for a living
Chapik : ooooh appadiamma i am sorry i get you wrong. my daddy is a liar
F2A : a liar?
Chapik : oh sorry my humble sorrys again i meaning to say my father is lawyer
F2A : ahhh okay. Your father being a lawyer i'm sure he's pretty well to do in india, why did you ship yourself in a box to our country?
Chapik : No my father never do it well, my mother always complaining.
F2A : ookay please lets keep family matters within the family aite.
Chapik : i dont understand you.
F2A : thats okay idiot. What i said was yr daddy must be rich, why then did you come to our country?
Chapik : ooooh apadithanva, no my father no rich. He go court only represent gays and homosexuals so they usually paying him with a ass-fuck so family no get money only daddy happy we no happy.
F2A : okay so you came to our country to earn a living?
Chapik : no i dont need living im alive already.
F2A : gawd.... so what is your mother tongue
Chapik : it is pink, nice pink and fleshy.
F2A : Has anyone ever told you how stupid you are?
Chapik : No i is the smartest most in my place
F2A : what a bunch of idiots.. the race with the biggest majority in our country is begining to look smart. What does your mom do for a living?
Chapik : She no work.
F2A : okay. We'll we've been talking cock for sometime now i guess i should ask you the questions i was supposed to ask you.
Chapik : cock cock cock. I have chicken in my house.
F2A : Yeah you were telling us how you fucked it.
Chapik : my chicken we no feed, it never move same sit for long long time.
F2A : is it dead?
Chapik : no cant be i fuck it daily.
F2A : you are one amazing man. So question one why did you come to our country?
Chapik : cheap whores
F2A : you came here for cheap whores? shouldn't you have gone to thailand or vietnam or if your looking for some class go to the land of the rising sun or something.
Chapik : thai-what?
F2A : you mean you don't know about thailand?
Chapik : thailand? what is that? can eat?
F2A : oh my god. so you came here all the way just for a cheap fuck? you and all your 500 million family members?
Chapik : yes that is right they all come for fuck. You see they all stil virgin pity them. You seeing virginity is not dignity, its just lack of opportunity [STATEMENT COPYRIGHT HELD BY OWNERS OF THIS WEBSITE]
F2A : how did your english suddenly become so good?
Chapik : I don't know i reading that line in book i just speaks.
F2A : okay. Well Mr.Chapik you need a fuck and i need you out of my country.
Chapik : yes can you help fuck me?
F2A : no not really, i cant help with that. but here's my offer you and your 500 million losers. Pay me 1000 bux each and i will show you the way to heaven.
Chapik : But i don't want to go to heaven.
F2A : No i mean heaven as in thailand. You know thailand-heaven, heaven-thai, thai..hea.. sigh nevermind.
Chapik : you have no mind?
F2A : Dude just shut it. okay see i have this thing, its called a map it will guide you to thailand. Now each of you pay me 1000 bux for this map and you can walk to thailand its pretty near.
Chapik : (with eyes wide open) r-r-eeaalllyyyy. i so love you thank you thank you please letting me kisses your hand.
F2A : no its okay man its cool chill...
Chapik : Thank you again, thank you my whole family thank you
F2A : hahah okay man its okay. So well i guess its solved. Umm make your way outside and we'll distribute the maps.
Chapik : yes thanks here have my chicken as a present.
F2A : holy shit no!.. its okay man you and keep yr chicken.
Chapik : okay thank you again byeee
F2A : aite man bye


Chapik walks off smiling and singing appadi podu podu assathi podu kannale appadi podu podu... and..our interviewer is still pulling himslef together wondering how he talked to such a stupid person for so long.


Once again Face to Ass has solved a major problem in our nation. The 7 man family of Chapik is on their way to thailand. After hiding for so long in Stepping Stones home in seputeh Face to Ass is proud to lead Chapik's family out of misery and on to a cheap fuck. Also not forgetting the ammount of money Face to Ass made out of idiots from Delhi.


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All characters, names, countires, places and names of things used ARE PURELY FICTIONAL and DOES NOT resemble anyone or anything in real life. If it does and you feel insulted, well too bad.